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Sunday, November 2, 2008

Something Artsy!

Greetings, Blossoming Writers!

I was talking to my friend J today, whose sister R (one of our very blogg-o-readers) is undergoing the yucky frustrations of infertility - failed IVFs and acupuncture and this-and-thats. It made hot tears well briefly behind my eyeballs. I started thinking about how TTC-ers and KuKd Mommas are alike, and J and I agreed that it all involves some variation of grief. Whether you're a KuKd Momma or never-been-knocked-up-but-trying-damn-hard, at some point you realize with dismay that what you thought would be easy is not, and may not - in fact - ever happen. This is a loss of a former self, a loss of a certain kind of innocent optimism. And like any loss, it results in some degree of coping.

Which brings me to an idea that's been percolating in my mind for some months now - the creation of a monthly literary magazine for the TTC/KuKd set, comprised of readers' submitted essays, poetry, columns, and even artwork/photography. There are lot of cool 'zines for so-called normal mommas - but what about the reproductively wacked? I believe that writing is hugely cathartic not just for me, but for others who are at a point in their lives where they need some human connection in this lonely-seeming journey of infertility or knocked-downage. Regardless of what your situation is, you certainly have a unique perspective that others can benefit from. Even if you yourself are not a KuKd/TTC momma or you've already moved on, you most certainly have a unique and fresh perspective to share.

I hope to begin "soon" (knowing that "soon" is a relative term): a monthly literary journal - online for now, to save trees and headaches - comprised of essays, poetry, possibly even ARTwork/photographs submitted by expressive people like you and me. Official call for submissions will be coming "soon!" (I'd LOVE to have a men's column, by the way - how freakin' cool would that be).

But first, I need your votes on prospective magazine titles! Which is your favorite? Any others to suggest?


Exhale
Whatever we're holding our breath for, we all have to stop and exhale at some point. Let go for a minute, debrief, take stock.


Differently Motherly

Is it motherly to want a child? I think so. Is it motherly to be told you'll never have a child of your own? Do we find other ways to mother? Perhaps we nurture ourselves and those around us instead.

Serendipity
I know - you're like, what does THAT mean? I wasn't sure either, so I looked it up. It essentially means the discovery of a good thing while looking for something else, kind of like an unexpected blessing. In search of child, we unexpectedly find voice, humanity, insight, wisdom, humor, strength, self, peace. Someone once told me this word is officially listed in the "top ten most difficult-to-translate English words." Perfect for a magazine name - nobody will know what it means!

Quinoa
See last sentence in "Serendipity" above. Same reason.

Shift
Shifting realities, shifting views, shifting moods. I really feel that life through the eyes of a KuKd/TTC woman is like looking through a prism or a fun house mirror. My only concern with "Shift" is that I fear it might look pretentious - what with all its one-word, simplistic arrogance. "Shift," baby, and if you don't know why this magazine is called that, you're just not cool enough to read it.

Prism
Same reason as "shift" above. There are so many feelings and emotional vomit associated with TTC/KuKd, that this might be an appropriate namesake. I wonder, though, if it sounds too much like some kind of reader for elementary school kids. Like "Reading Rainbow" or some such childishness.


Conception Secrets of the Virgin Mother Mary (how the fuck DID she do that anyway?!)

Just kidding, dawg.

Penis + Vagina = Baby, and Other Lies Your Mother Told You
Another just kidding, dahling.

Ivy
I think Ivy is such a pretty name for a girl. That aside, I picture TTC/KUKD women sometimes as ivy climbing up a trellis, grabbing on to what we can, changing course from time to time, overcoming setbacks, constantly aiming higher.

Other suggestions?

17 comments:

sharonvw said...

Great idea Mon. I like Exhale because I often find myself holding my breathe along the route of this difficult journey.
Another suggestion and I know this is already exists for a traditional Mother's mag, but what about Living & Loving? A reminder to us all to continue to live our lives because I know so many of us get stuck along the way and forget that life is passig us by, at least I know I did. I stopped living for a long time, I just existed from one MC to the next and one fertility treatment to the next.

sharonvw said...

Great idea Mon. I like Exhale because I often find myself holding my breathe along the route of this difficult journey.
Another suggestion and I know this is already exists for a traditional Mother's mag, but what about Living & Loving? A reminder to us all to continue to live our lives because I know so many of us get stuck along the way and forget that life is passig us by, at least I know I did. I stopped living for a long time, I just existed from one MC to the next and one fertility treatment to the next.

*~*Lis*~* said...

I'd have to go with Serendipity - it's one of my favorite words. I actually was planning on naming my next cat Serendipity, before I met a guy allergic to cats and started to realize they were evil anyway.

It's a great word and totally fits this article!

And is Quinoa that food thing we're supposed to like?

Michelle said...

This is a great idea. I like Serendipity or Exhale. If I think of any others I will let you know.

Rachel said...

I like Serendipity and Ivy (I love that as a girls' name too), but they are all good and the online magazine is SUCH a nice concept.

janis said...

Great idea! I think I like Ivy best... although I have to say the last second and last third made me hooted! You are too funny, you twisted gal!

Shinejil said...

You mean I can't vote for the second-to-last one?!?

Damn.

Then I'll have to say Quinoa. The only "grain" that's really a seed...

Monica LeMoine said...

Great feedback, ladies! Looks like Serendipity and Exhale might be on the projected short list. (By the way, I freakin' hate when people group me with a bunch of other gals and call us "ladies." I mean, what is this, an estrogen-sorority-tea-party or something!??)

SHINEJIL: thanks for that tidbit about Quinoa. Who knew.

LIS: Yes, quinoa is "that food thing."

familyoftwo98 said...

I like Exhale...but how about Waiting to Exhale?

We always seem to be waiting and always seem to be holding our breath. Though my second favorite is Penis + Vagina...that is a classic :)

Rebecca said...

Glad that I am somehow inspiring something creative when I feel so uninspired myself these days!! I love the idea of the magazine and look forward to reading it. I'm not very creative but I do like to write so maybe I'll even be convinced to contribute something...I definitely have a lot to say about this topic - maybe my first article could be about how I woke up in the middle of the night last night thinking about how my pregnant (ex?) friend-who-wasn't-even-trying-and-thought-she-had-parasites stole my baby (I guess because she is due shortly after I would have been due if I hadn't miscarried)...yes, now I am not only thinking about it all day long, but evidently in my sleep too. NICE.

Anyway, I like a lot of the titles (the penis lie one is my favorite - these days, I can't even fathom that some people actually make babies from HAVING SEX!).

Probably my favorite is Exhale because in my yoga for fertility practice, the inhale represents your ability to receive, and the exhale represents your ability to let go.

I like the meanings behind Shift, but it sounds too much like Shaft - and I already feel like I've gotten the shaft in this, so don't need more of that!

Serendipity is a good word, so if others vote for that, I'd go along happily.

And I'll take quinoa in any form any time - it truly is delicious. But KuKd/TTC is definitely NOT delicious, so maybe not the best name for this magazine...

Kristen said...

I like Differently Motherly because it's immediately obvious what the zine is about. But of course, you knew I'd say that. :-) I also like Exhale.

My favorite name is KU/KD -- can you share your book's name with a zine?

Rebecca said...

Funny - the New York Times online featured quinoa in an article yesterday. Read more about the wonder grain (or seed, as we learned from SHINEJIL): http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/03/health/nutrition/03recipehealth.html?em

Monica LeMoine said...

REBECCA - Ha ha! First, I know. Babies from SEX?!? What an utterly asTOUNding concept! And thank you for the quinoa link. Freakin' random, dude.

KRISTEN: I thought about KuKd, but thought that might not take into account those with can't-get-knocked-up issues (and therefore never been knocked down).

Rebecca said...

Sorry to inundate with comments, but I have the day off of work for the elections, and stumbled across another interesting article in the Times on how a woman's diet may affect the sex of the baby (basic premise: starvation diet = girl; well-fed=boy): http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/04/23/boy-or-girl-the-answer-may-depend-on-moms-eating-habits/

Monica LeMoine said...

Rebecca: I guess IF it ever happens, it'll be another boy for me, then. I'm well-fed and proud.

chicklet said...

I'm glad you chose Exhale, it's my favorite. My alternate choice would've been Shift:-)

Echo said...

I think that last article is whacked... Not well fed, rocky pregnancy, beautiful little boy. Who knows though? It's all a mystery to me anymore. I'm content in the fact that I know nothing. And so glad to have found this blog. In a world of loneliness it's good to know I'm not actually alone. Thank you...