It's another one of those hallucinatory weeks, I guess.
You know that last post I did? The one about KuKd and marriage? Well, apparently I totally made that whole thing up. My apologies. Either that, or it's just further proof that my brain exists on a separate planet from Kevin's, a planet swirling with imaginary clouds of drama and evil little mice whose primary function is to run around and stir up anxiety inside my brain.
The other day, we had a conversation that went something like this, as Kevin scanned the ESPN website on his laptop (primarily paying attention to me, of course - just halfheartedly glancing through the scores out of habit):
Me: "I did a blog post about patching up cracks in our relationship."
K: "What cracks?"
Me: "You know, all of our relationship problems. Like the fact that I haven't been paying enough attention to your job woes. The fact that were aren't totally clinging to each other as we used to. The fact that I have other friends at work and go out for beers with them, without you. The fact that I can't seem to keep the house clean! The fact that I'm not a good, clingy wife! All of those things bother you, remember?"
K: "They do? Hmm. That's news to me. Oh, sweet!"
Me: "Sweet? Sweet what?"
K: "The Mariners won five to three."
Me: "Kevin! This is serious! So you mean, nothing's bothering you about our relationship? You aren't wishing I were sitting at home staring at the door in a French maid outfit each night and a fresh prime-rib dinner already made?"
K: "Nothing's bothering me. You're overthinking. Not that the French made outfit with prime-rib wouldn't be half bad. Fuck."
Me: "Fuck? Fuck what?" (thinking, in a state of mild panic, that he just remembered that big thing that's been bothering him lately)
K: "We're gonna be out of town when the Mariners play Chicago."